All posts by Xaphod

The Ministratum Cycle – An Update

Self, Writing, , ,

Today the word count of my embryonic novel has passed the 62 thousand word point, which I’m told is meant to mean that it gets easier because I’m meant to be well past the difficult ‘getting started’ point.  I don’t really feel that way though right now.

My medication is being rather funny in that I’m starting to feel like I’m on a 30 hour day cycle, sleeping ten hours, then awake for twenty.  Unfortunately the Earth is simply spinning too quickly, and despite my asking as forcefully as I can it simply refuses to slow down.
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Delusion

Self, thoughts, , , , , , ,

I worry sometimes whether I’m deluding myself. These are often my darkest moments, when the muse has gone quiet and I’m sitting with a notebook or an app of some sort in front of me, and the thought presents itself: “I’m not actually any good at any of this”.

At these points I start to doubt my abilities, and begin to believe – and I’m having to tell myself now that this belief is in spite of evidence to the contrary – that I am simply not cut out for anything other than what I am right now.

Heroes, part one.

inspiration, , ,

When I think of being an author, of writing, I can’t help think about all the work of others I have read over the years, about the things that inspire me, about the works that have touched and moved me.  I know it’s a cliché to talk about standing on the shoulders of giants, but in many ways the cliché rings true.

If I do ever become successful as an author, then it will be, to a greater or lesser extent, due to the works of various authors who have inspired me to put pen to paper – or rather, finger to keyboard.  I want to take the time to talk about a few of these literary heroes, and will probably do so again so don’t be fooled into thinking what I say in this post is by any means an exhaustive list.

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The Founding of the Ministratum Cycle

rpg, Writing, , , , , , ,

My story concept for my current novel began about a year ago as a table-top role playing game (RPG) scenario. Set in a pseudo-medieval fantasy realm, the concept focused on a patriarchal theocratic society where what would often be considered normal freedoms would be oppressed.

It began with three main characters, who were somewhat fantasy clichés to begin with. There was the burly, lecherous blacksmith, the innocent nature-loving herbalist, and the young fresh-faced lad. In our RPG sessions these characters were portrayed by my good friend Phil, my other half Anna, and my good friend Tony, and I was the GM – games master – essentially the one who controlled the story.

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Pinning Ideas Down

Self, thoughts, , ,

Sometimes trying to be creative when being me, with this anxious, easily distracted but difficult to steer mind, is difficult. At times, I feel a little like a child walking into the greatest toyshop in the world, and being unable to move because so many urges and so many bright shiny colours are trying to drag my mental state in so many different directions.

“Ooh! Oooh! Over here!” shouts a fascinating concept for a webcomic.

“Pick me! Pick me!” cries an innovative idea for a social networking website.

“I’m the one you want!” the shrieking voice of a videogame concept echoes around my head.

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Bargaining With The Muse

Self, Writing, , , , , ,
Where to start… perhaps with something that looks like a quote, but is actually written by me… yeah that’ll do.
The muse cannot be ordered, or tricked, for she comes when she will.
She can only be cajoled, persuaded, or bartered with, and any bargain may both weaken and strengthen he that makes it.
Creativity is a difficult pursuit, and a difficult goal, for simply expressing a desire to be more creative is no more conducive to actual output of ‘stuff’ than wanting to learn to drive is conducive to becoming a racing driver.